Not Healthy Egg Nog French Toast

     I've decided to change the focus of this blog. It will no longer be on my random thoughts of late. I am doing this because a) I haven't made a penny on it so far (nor have I been offered a book deal), and b) I am pretty much out of things to say. So, I've scoured the internet and found that there are virtually no websites that deal with food in any form. So I am here to fill that void with my new cooking blog. 

     I make a lot of food really well: grilled cheese sandwiches, not grilled cheese sandwiches, a pineapple-teriyaki chicken thing, and milkshakes. Here's another one:

Not Healthy Egg Nog French Toast

     This is a recipe I made up when I had egg nog and stale bread. It turned out to be delicious. If you follow my steps precisely, yours might turn out almost as good.

You will need:

• Bread (I prefer artisan bread, preferably stale, and I recommend avoiding sourdough). This bread will eventually turn into toast.
• Cinnamon
• Your favorite egg nog
• One (1) avocado
• Apricot preserves
• Your least favorite cereal (not pictured)
• A cutting board
• A knife
• A stovetop
• A power source for your stovetop
• um... a mousepad, apparently?
• and, orange peels? I should have cleaned off the counter before I took pictures.
• A treadmill

Steps:

      1.  Turn on your stovetop (make sure it is connected to a power source!)

      2. Slice the bread into thin pieces. You want them thin enough so that when it's dipped in the egg nog it touches on both sides.

     3. Pour the egg nog into a bowl (shoot, I forgot to tell you you'll need a bowl, just improvise).

4. Dip one side of the bread into the nog.

5. Dip the other side of the bread into the nog

6. Place the soon-to-be-toast on the stovetop (have something between the bread and the heat, preferably metal)

7. Sprinkle cinnamon over the bread (still not toast yet!!)

8. Flip the bread. (Sorry, I've never done this before, do you need all of these steps? Really it's a pretty self-explanatory process. Dip bread, heat bread, eat bread. It could have been three steps I suppose.)

9. Sprinkle cinnamon over the almost toast (no, that's not the same picture as step 7)

10. Grab your now-toast, your avocado, and the leftover bowl of egg nog.

11. Skip step 11.

12. Eat the food before your spouse wakes up! He/she always wants some of that!

12. AND, you can drink the left over egg nog from the bowl! Like a cat! Or pour it into a cup. Or pour it back into the carton it came from. These are all legitimate options that are not gross, and now the egg nog is peppered with stale bread crumbs!

13. When you finish eating, put the avocado back where it came from. It wouldn't go well with this meal, now that I think about it. 

14. When you are done eating, get on the treadmill for a while, or else you might gain six pounds.

     Sure is delicious, huh!? Thanks for reading!